Consequences of invalidating environments df command not updating
“Invalidating members of such environments are often vigorous in promulgating their point of view and actively communicate frustration with an individual’s inability to adhere to a similar point of view.” What are the consequences of invalidating environments? Â I see it all the time in daily life.Â I’m always trying to teach my clients’ staff to recognize the client’s feelings as real and valid, and to let them know that they are understood, rather than brushing them off with “I like it better when you’re happy.”Â If you’re not happy, you’re not happy.Â Sometimes all it takes is for the person you are talking to to understand what you are trying to say and recognize that it is important to you, rather than brushing you off.Â When we feel unheard, we tend to keep saying it louder and louder to try to be heard.Â It may not be possible to let it go without a clear response that is sensitive to the validity of our feelings and message.
I guess that’s all that I dare to say right here and right now.Â I don’t think that I can handle the risk of being shut down again.
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In short, if we grow up as a child without having our emotions validated by our caregivers, how are we supposed to know what an emotion is and how to deal with it?
If we got sad when a friend moved away when we were six years old, and our caregiver said ‘Oh come on stop crying, you will make new friends’ it doesn’t teach us anything about that emotion we were feeling (in this case, sadness at the absence of our friend).
Many people are emotionally vulnerable but never develop BPD if they are not in an invalidating environment. Being emotional can be great as it can make a person charismatic, interesting, passionate about life and feel others’ pain deeply and are often empathetic and sympathetic.
Similarly many people have stressful invalidating or abusive childhoods never develop BPD, because they are not so emotional. People who are less emotional may not know exactly what to do with a very emotional person, especially an emotional child.
Her experiences are attributed to socially unacceptable characteristics or personality traits.